寂しさ
Monday, April 3rd, 2006Yes I’m still awake.
And trying to do my ERP.
While listening to the Seikai soundtracks.
Quite a fruitless attempt, but I could say that I’m sort of enjoying myself.
But it really feels quite lonely.
I guess I’ve been feeling that acutely since I finished Kimagure.
Or maybe, ever since God knows when…
Much of the Seikai music resonate with me. To date it is my favorite OST. I may prefer songs from other series, but nothing matches the soundtrack of Seikai. Not even Kajiura Yuki ones. Mai-Otome is nice, but it doesn’t even come close.
The soundtrack’s predominantly strings-based music, and that gives it a distinctly tragic quality. I’ve always had a weakness for strings. Nothing beats a string instrument at expression of pathos. As you probably know, I’m a darker sort of person. Music with a tragic, sad, lonely or reflective mood often suit my tastes. Seikai happens to fit in nicely.
I wonder what it is like to be an Abh. They call themselves ‘kin of the stars’. It is the truth. I always feel that to be an Abh is to be lonely. Bearing the guilt of long-gone ancestors, the burden of maintaining a vast empire, and to be the subject of hate and envy - that isn’t enviable in the least.
The love story set in Seikai is, if not the best, then surely the top 3 out of all those I’ve read or came into contact with in whatever media. What strikes me? It’s the tragedy. Romeo and Juliet might be a common idea of a tragedy, but guess what? It ends. And fast.
The dead can’t feel. But the living do. Just as mourning the dead is not a duty to them, but that of to the living, a love story that doesn’t end is much more touching. More so if there is not going to be a happy ending. As was clearly stated, Jinto has half the lifespan of Lafiel. After serving their Star Forces obligations, Jinto doesn’t have all that much time left. What if Lafiel was to serve as Empress? They can’t really be together, at least not for long before Jinto dies. The most tragic way to live is to be left alone after the death of your dearest one. Hence, the second half of Lafiel’s life can never be a happy one.
I don’t know why I’m thinking so much about this subject when I should be doing my work. But seriously I don’t give a ratfuck about what political system suits Rwanda or how the fuck Lee Kuan Yew grappled with issues he faced as prime minister. I don’t give a damn as to why R cos (x+a) = whatevershit. I just don’t care.
I’m being consumed by the greatest creations of people. Art, be it music, literature, music, film - they have a profound impact on me. So much so that I’m getting consumed in what I perceive to be some of Man’s greatest creations - a love story.
Yes, I loved Kimagure Orange Road. But ultimately, Seikai will have a special, immovable place in my heart. I can’t say I really identify with it, but somehow, to me, that semi-requited, pure, and perhaps doomed love is the most beautiful of all.